Ring Shopping

So last week, we decided to go ring shopping. Or maybe I did...Or no, maybe he did. I'm confused. Supposedly Bob has been putting money a ring at a small local jewelry store back in Arizona. Do I believe that? No, not really. It was "confessed" to me while he was drunk one evening a year ago. So my question is, Why would someone be putting money on a ring for over a year but has no intentions of getting married "anytime soon"?

Back to the ring shopping--we talked about rings one night and since he thought it was what I wanted so much he comes up with the brilliant idea "Let's go look for rings tomorrow!" . Yeah, Yeah, I hear you. What's the catch? So that day, we are arguing on the way to the jewelry store- I forgot what we were even arguing about. I honestly didn't want to walk into the store. We did anyway. The salesperson asked questions. I sit there in silence at first. I got to the point where I feel like if I give any input or say anything, I am "rushing" him or making him do something he doesn't want to do. Bob doesn't have any answers. "So when are you guys planning on getting married?" ...I point to Bob. I don't have any of these answers. You know, he always says everything has to be on my time. But in marriage case, if it's not on my time, then it has to be on his time. It's always going to be on someone's time. It's not fair to me that I have to be on his time and it isn't fair for me to be on his time.

So ring shopping wasn't very successful. I would have to get the ring in my name and he would have to pay it. Not a cool setup, but it will have to work. So last night I ask, "What is the purpose of going ring shopping if you aren't going to 'propose' soon?" Firstly, I have to sign for the ring so its not like he can sneak and get it and have this huge proposal. Forget a huge proposal-Its 2009. To be honest, we don't have the money for a ring. It could be fit into the budget though. Do we have to have these rings and pieces of symbolism to get married? I don't think so. If we truly love each other, we can get married without flashy rings until we have more money. Being conventional at this point is out the window.